I don’t doubt, I understand God is Real.
I’m walking about, just talking to Him.
The reason simple, Lord I need to Heal.
I filled my gourd with pain to the brim.
Afraid it will overflow, and I’ll just lose it.
Scarred of the low, of the coming collapse.
Hate my situation, that I’ll admit.
Need motivation, fearing the relapse.
Circumstances got me fearing that thought
Don’t want to take chances, looking for hope.
Answer God, does this have to be my lot?
My mind’s abroad searching, please help me cope.
Thinking should I put a gun to my head.
Feel stunned thinking I could take the shots.
Leave this realm, to talk to the one who bled.
Lost the helm what’s going on with my thoughts?
Where’s the ship going? Did I drop anchor?
The sea still flowing but we’re standing still.
I am storing my pain, like a banker.
Should lose to gain or admit that I’m ill.
These are the two things that I just won’t do.
I have too many kings that rule my life.
Doesn’t work, there’s no peace, I feel subdued.
Hate to police them, I’m filled with strife,
Gifted one life should I throw it away?
The knife in my hands I decide who wins,
I’m in the pit, chose to climb out today.
This is it, And so my Journey begins.